Exiting my comfort zone

11 March 2011

I have worked for two companies that I wasn’t in charge of in my life. I spent a short stint during college at a computer repair and business network shop. I did a lot of different things there from replacing parts in Apple computers to troubleshooting wireless networks. I hated it. I could never understand why customers asked what was wrong when I would fix a problem knowing full-well that the answer coming out of my mouth would be incomprehensible to them. This job even made me change my major because one of my bosses was an MIS grad, as I was at the time, from K-State and I realized this isn’t something I wanted to do for then rest of my life. He was a great guy, don’t get me wrong, but I couldn’t see myself fixing computers for people for the rest of my life.

The only person I fix computers for now if I am not getting paid is my mom.

The other job is a company I have worked for during the summers, while on break, and on the weekends since I was 14. My dad owns half of the company, called Stutler Technologies. I have done nearly everything for them that involved anything technical and am grateful to have had the opportunity to work in an environment where I managed myself and the projects I was working on.

Most people assume, “oh you worked for your dad? You must have just been sitting around checking facebook every five minutes.” In reality I spent most of my time gaining knowledge about very technical systems and solving problems reserved for people with specialized education at bigger companies. This misconception for me probably arose when I spent two summers in a row building and rebuilding the company website with facebook open in the background and all the times when I would spend long hours upgrading and fixing problems with E-Mail and other information systems.

The only area that I wasn’t involved was the business and sales departments. I am not sure why I was never involved in this stuff, I know I could have brought a lot to the table, especially now; but I was only around for a few months at a time and the higher ups probably thought this wasn’t enough time to learn what I needed to know and be able to accomplish anything. I always enjoyed when my dad would discuss the business side of things with me.

For the first time in my life, I am officially not returning to Stutler Technologies this summer, I can’t say I am not a little sad to say it, but it is something I feel I have to do. I will be missing out on traveling to new places and spending time with people I have gotten to know well over the years.

My parents came up to Manhattan last Sunday to celebrate my sisters birthday and with the help of a suggestive question about my summer plans from my mom, I broke the news to them. My dad wasn’t upset or even surprised, I guess he knew I would be moving on to other things eventually.

The move stems from a number of different problems I have been facing while there for the last few years and the availability of offices through K-State’s business incubator program.

The first is the need to get out from under my father’s wing and accomplish something that I can own. I used to envision a future where the “prodigal son” returns to much respect and acceptance of everyone there. Lately there has been less of that as my interests have turned more fiercely towards web development and as I have slowly become better at the craft. Building websites and web applications is truly where I see my path taking me now and have little desire of a return.

Another reason is based on something different and I don’t want it to sound condescending because it is likely the people I worked with probably didn’t mean to come off this way but I have a growing feeling of lack of respect. I know what I am capable of and the areas in which I shine but rarely did my coworkers get to see this or have the understanding to comprehend my abilities.

It all came to a head this last summer when my new manager wanted to send me on a job, of which I would be in charge. Being more or less of an outsider he recognized my ability to pick up new things, but someone told him that I couldn’t do it. I wasn’t ready. I am extraordinarily grateful that he didn’t listen to them and sent me on the job anyways and I proved myself and proved them wrong. Afterwards more jobs followed for which I was in charge and then the summer ended and I was left feeling I couldn’t gain that respect if I continued working for my dad.

Another reason I am making this move is because when I am at home I am the opposite of productive: I watch too much TV, spend time wishing I was somewhere else, and basically procrastinate in any way imaginable. I also eat incredibly unhealthy while I am home. To get anything done I have to go down to my cubicle at Stutler and force myself to work. This usually leads to working on projects for Stutler that are not my own or where my interests lie. Now that I will finally have office space in Manhattan after spring break I will have a work zone that can be tailored to inspire creativity and focus.

The final reason I decided to move on is based in my entrepreneurialism. I need spare time to build things, to tinker. With my current position inside the company I didn’t have much free time. I spent 60-80 hours each week traveling and working at different job sites. Lots of manual labor that left me feeling exhausted at the end of the day didn’t coincide well with needing to be focused and sharp so I could be creative and write code. I tried doing this last summer and it left me exhausted with half assed PHP code that was no where near complete at the end of the summer.

Don’t get me wrong, the time I spent at Stutler was invaluable: I sharpened my technical skills, was free to learn on my own, and they paid for many of my computers (in my eyes having a work computer that I also used for school and for web development is the only special treatment I received). The variety of jobs I worked on along with the sports I played in high school built character inside me that i see in few other people that I am around. Without working there I wouldn’t have the understanding of messaging systems I do now, nor would I have the desire to design the perfect solution for communication I am currently working on (called Bunchd).

However it is time for me to leave the metaphorical nest of a great, flexible job where I make more per hour than 99% of my friends. As many of my close friends begin to graduate I feel that I am in a unique position with another year of school left and the freedom and time to build cool things and try out new opportunities.

As my high school basketball coach would say, it’s all about exiting your comfort zone.

XitZone